so, i had a nice long talk with my mom last night. i told her that if she really felt that something bad was going to happen to me when i was flying, then i would not go. she said that she wants me to go and that she will not stop me.

the thing is, i really think that she is depressed about me "growing up". and the fact that she no longer has as much of a say in the decisions i make, drives her mad. now i see where i get my controlling attitude from. it's sad, really. but, i actually took the time to explain to her the things that were happening with john. the things that we've discussed and the fact that john is not just another guy i am dating. and that he's not going anywhere. so, she needs to respect the fact that he is here, and that he is my "boyfriend". i think she gets it now. i hope she does at least, because it's important to me that she accepts the decisions i make.

phew. i feel all grown up.