let me recap the past 18 hours for all of you whom i have not spoken with.

this weekend, i was supposed to go to LA to see john mayer for my good friend sharon's birthday. i was scheduled to leave on friday afternoon. friday afternoon at a time that would necessitate my leaving a couple hours early. not a big deal. friday's are usually slow after lunch, sharon (my boss) said it wouldn't be a problem. i was so excited about the trip, that i made the mistake of telling you-know-who that i was planning on working a half day on friday. no need for a vacation slip, it had already been approved. so yesterday, i find out that murle was taking a vacation from thursday (today) until tuesday. that's fine. i knew she was going to be gone. THEN i find out that not only is murle going to be gone, but you-know-who has coincidentally requested friday and monday off. funny how she never mentioned it to me. now, seeing as though i never turned in a request form, i never "officially" got permission to go. the thing is, it was a verbal agreement. i asked weeks ago, and i should be able to go. however, if i do go, i would be leaving sharon alone, with no support. so it's really more of a moral dilema than anything else. so, being the adult that i am; i have decided that my job is more important than going to LA for sharon's birthday and seeing john mayer. which in reality, is not but i cannot even think about what would happen if i were to lose this job.

next topic- i have been totally irrational as of late. my moodswings have been so drastic and so frequent, that i am beginning to scare myself. i don't understand why they are happening so frequently. i am starting to wonder if there *is* something wrong with me. i feel sorry for john, he's constantly getting the grunt of them. it's not like i am not trying to avoid them, i just find myself becoming irritated at trivial things. and not only that, but these trivial things stay in my head and effect the way i perceive other situations. does that make sense? my mom suggested that i take an anger management class but, i'm not angry. i am actually the happiest i have ever been. i think that i am a control freak. and when things don't go my way, i get pissed.

anyway, last night i was talking to my dad about my stepmom's birthday party. he is SO excited about it. more importantly, he cannot wait to meet john. he was asking all kinds of questions about him. it was really cute. the weird thing, is that my dad and barbara never really meet the guys i date, because they live so far away. it's usually not possible to make a weekend trip out there. so, this is kind of major. the good thing is that there will be LOTS of people around so, i am not at all worried about my dad drilling john. once he see's how much john cares and respects me, i have no doubt that he will love him. :)

i think that's enough for now.